Checking in with Past Me, I always like to start with the “why”s

Not those nasty rhetorical why‘s though, I’m sure you know what I mean.

The “rhetorical why” sounds like “Why didn’t you think to do this sooner? Is there something wrong with you?” and it FEELS for just a second like it might be problem solving.

It solves nothing. It’s only punishing. Time to let it go.

Behavior only changes with reinforcement of what we want more of.

Self-blame like the “rhetorical why” doesn’t build motivation.

(It just whispers in our ears that without it we won’t succeed.)

Guess who has two thumbs and isn’t doing that anymore?

You too, huh?

The whys that work are the genuinely curious ones. The ones with some fathomable answer that isn’t “Because I SHOULD have known better?…idk”

The whys that work sound more like:

• Why was I nervous about trying it this way before?
• Why did I have a rule in my head that said there was only one way to do it?
• Why was my self-talk so focused on keeping me from making the effort?
• Why was I working under assumptions that it needed to be perfect?
• Why was I framing a learning opportunity as an example of failure?

Rhetorical whys keep us stuck spinning our wheels toward mediocrity. They don’t build lasting motivation, they just keep us fixated on what went wrong.

Curious whys give us a path toward expansive thought and a possibility of getting useful answers.

Right now, My curious whys sound like:

“Why am I doing all this?

Why do I have all these ideas bouncing around in my head?

Why have I been so afraid to share them with other likeminded people?

Why can’t I keep a new inspiration or practice going sustainably?”

Did you want to know what builds sustainable inspiration & keeps up our motivation?

The answer is Vision

There are many ways to go about highlighting this new 12 week conversation system we’re sampling over here in Elise-land during the next 3 months, and the 5 Disciplines from the 12 Week Year are calling to me immediately.

For the next few weeks, let’s start there.

Discipline 1: Vision

A compelling vision creates a clear picture of the future…a powerful emotional connection that promotes a sustained commitment & continual action

The 12 Week Year (Moran, Lennington 2013). Chapter 12

I used to think a vision was a waste of valuable action time. I now see the error of my ways.

Myths that held back Past Me:

• MYTH: If I spend too much time dreaming about where I want to be, I won’t spend any time or effort on getting there
• FACT: Spending a bit of time building out, imagining, and breathing life into my vision each day (and before a big task) can hugely increase BOTH my inspiration for starting something and my willingness to complete it.
  
  What does it feel like when I’m inspired to create?
  Who or what will I do it for?

• MYTH: My Vision feels too far away to reasonably achieve any time soon. Why even bother thinking about what could be different? It feels impossible to reach.
• FACT: This sort of self-talk is the stuff that has us checking the obligation boxes for our bare-minimum days and rolling into our evenings exhausted from another day … and burnt the heck out.
  
  Did you take any steps towards the “impossible” future on a day like that?
  Yeah, didn’t think so.
  No judgment. I wouldn’t either.
  Who has energy for long term goals when we’re already burnt out?
  
• MYTH: I don’t think I even have a Vision. I’m just trying to function and survive over here. That sounds like a lot of wishful thinking.
• FACT: We make zero progress toward the goals we talk ourselves out of before even beginning them. Our brains are wired to fear the unknown.
  
  What if we overcame that programming by manifesting possibilities rather than failures?

Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs

Are you going to let fear around the possibility of success (at the cost of a fair amount of effort) keep you in self-sabotage?

Without even imagining what you might be capable of?

Without even trying?

I’m not.

Not anymore.

Time to dream up a new Vision.